Memorials and Sympathy Poems
Unfortunately, the Coronavirus, Covid-19 is making us focus on memorials for those who have died. Hundreds of thousands of people are dying suddenly. This pandemic is even killing younger people now. It's a very stressful and sad time in our lives. You see memorials all over the news for people who have died from this terrible virus.
It's hard to know what to say to someone who has lost a loved one. It's said that "holding space" which essentially means just sitting with another person silently is often enough to offer your true sympathy. When you know the person who has passed, writing a sympathy card or a memorial poem can help people go through their grief.
Grief is love that has nowhere to go...
A Calligraphy memorial is always sad work, especially when it's a memorial for a young person or a child. When you have your own child you don't even want to imagine the pain these poor parents are going through. I've had to write through tears when writing this sad song for a newborn who left his family way too early. Writing and designing calligraphy is generally for commemorating special happy occasions.
But calligraphy services also includes writing memorials allows someone to look at their photo and feel that love again. Although I think it takes time for the sad feelings to soften. Those feelings don't ever go away - especially when you are writing a memorial to someone you dearly loved.
Do Not Stand By My Grave and Weep
Memorial For A Beloved Mother
It took a long time for me to be able to look at photos of my mom, Adele without bursting into tears. Even now, many years later, I'm tearing up as I'm writing this. But I love looking at photographs of my mom with the family, and with me. Everyone said we looked a lot alike. My mom was an incredible woman: kind, funny, intelligent, accomplished and so loving.
Memorial For Favorite Relatives
Memorials from Co-workers and Businesses
This is a memorial that was written by a company where this lovely woman volunteered her time. This calligraphy memorial was also sent to her husband as a gift.
Gone From My Site
The "Parable of Immortality" is also known as "Gone From My Sight". It was written by Henry van Dyke, Jr. It is a very moving poem that I gave to my dear friend when her 20 year old son passed away from cancer. She brought it to her grief group and the other parents there felt great comfort from reading it.
Gone From My Sight
I am standing upon the seashore. A ship, at my side,
spreads her white sails to the moving breeze and starts
for the blue ocean. She is an object of beauty and strength.
I stand and watch her until, at length, she hangs like a speck
of white cloud just where the sea and sky come to mingle with each other.
Then, someone at my side says, "There, she is gone."
Gone from my sight. That is all. She is just as large in mast,
hull and spar as she was when she left my side.
And, she is just as able to bear her load of living freight to her destined port.
Her diminished size is in me -- not in her.
And, just at the moment when someone says, "There, she is gone,"
there are other eyes watching her coming, and other voices
ready to take up the glad shout, "Here she comes!"
It's really lovely to read something that shows the person who passed has touched many lives. Writing good memories of the person brings them back - maybe you can hear their voice, their laugh, or their special touch when you read about them.
Memorial Poems and Stories
I went through a terrible time in my life when my children were teenagers. They had friends who had passed away from cancer or from a terrible accident. I was so depressed that it was very hard to get through the day. Two of these young people were the first born of very good friends of mine.
It is so hard to find the words to say when someone loses a child. But I wrote out this beautiful story for her. She said just reading it made her feel a lot better. Click on it so you can read it.
How To Help Someone Who Is Grieving
My daughter was a hospice social worker. She told me that Hospice offers grief groups at no charge. These social workers are the best at helping you through a hard time when you lose someone you care about. There are Hospice services all over the country. Don't let the grief get the best of you- do avail yourself of the free services of hospice.
A Sympathy Book To Help Dealing With Loss
My dear friend and fellow calligrapher, Joanne Fink wrote a beautiful book in calligraphy after the sudden and totally unexpected loss of her husband. I have been giving her beautiful book, "When You Lose Someone You Love" to my closest friends after their loss. She sent me this book when my younger brother died. It really helped me feel not so alone and "lost". It taught me that my feelings were normal and not that different from everyone else who loses someone they loved.
This is what my friend wrote to me after I gave her this sympathy book:
Lianda, Joanne's book tells about the complexity of grief and how totally disorienting it is. So many of the pages describe just what I've experienced. The combination of heartfelt emotions with gorgeous art is healing.
It is comforting to me to know that Joanne has turned her sorrow into help for other people. I want to be like her, and how I hope that my grandchildren can use their grief as productively as Joanne's son and daughter have.
I know that I will re read this beautiful book again and again, and I will loan it to Mark, my grandchildren, and my daughter Karen too. Thank you so much for bringing it to me, Lianda, and for the meaningful bookmark as well. You really have helped me.
Most people will lose someone they love, or even a beloved pet, at some point in their life. Offering your silence, a moving poem or a sympathy statement from your heart can be the thing that helps people begin the long journey of healing.